Topic: Radio Wars: A Primer

[shemps#1]

The exodus of Howard Stern from old-fashioned radio to satellite radio has turned the radio broadcast industry upside-down. Stern’s FM Empire was split up between many personalities, but for the most part between 4 personalities under the new Free FM banner.

With the advent of satellite radio, as well as podcasting, there are many choices out there, and I have listened to chunks of or entire shows of the main choices out there. So without further adieu I present to you a primer, if you will, of the various listening choices out there: whether you are looking for something interesting on the ride to and from work or are looking for something that may be better than what is on TV. Let's start off with the Man himself:

1.   Howard Stern
Can Be Heard On: Sirius Satellite Radio Ch. 100 (Howard 100) 6-10/11am EST and Ch. 101 (Howard 101) 6-10/11am PST.

Howard Stern is the biggest, most famous radio personality of all time, and with good reason. The ignorant out there might dismiss Stern as nothing but tits and ass, but if they actually took the time to listen to the show they would realize that’s not the case. His stunts over the years are too numerous to be mentioned in this primer. Influenced by the legendary stand-up comedian Lenny Bruce, Stern has been a major target of the Religious Right and the US Government. Clocking in at almost $3 million dollars, he is by far the most cumulatively fined radio performer in history. Critics are already expecting Stern to use the FCC free satellite format to curse up a storm, but the swearing on the show has been of a natural flow of speech than swearing for the sake of swearing. Stern is in control of two stations on Sirius, which feature not only his morning show but various other Stern-related programming as well as The Bubba the Love Sponge Show (which I will get to later).

History
•   Started out on a small station in Briarcliff Manor, NY
•   Moved to WCCC 106.9 FM Hartford CT in 1978
•   Briefly Moved to WWWW (W4) Detroit in 1981/82 until it switched from rock to country.
•   Moved to 101.1 FM Washington DC in 1981/82. During his short tenure there he made the station the #1 rated station in the market.
•   Moved to WNBC AM in NYC in 1982, airing after then-popular morning man Don Imus. His ratings would soon eclipse those of Imus. Fired in 1985 after numerous battles with management.
•   Hired by WXRK 92.3 (K-ROCK) NYC (now Free FM) in November 1985. Moved to the morning-drive in early 1986 and became the #1 rated show in the nation’s biggest market.
•   Started Syndication via Infinity Broadcasting in 1986 when he aired in Philadelphia. Despite the naysayers he quickly became #1 in Philly, and subsequently LA, Boston, DC, and various other markets. First syndicated FM morning drive show in history.
•   At its peak the show was syndicated in 62 markets across the US as well as Montreal and Toronto.
•   Most stations that removed him caved in to complaints rather than low ratings.
•   Has written two best selling books; the first, Private Parts was adapted into a movie in which he starred.
•   Has had television shows on WWOR 9 TV (NY/NJ) (sketch comedy) early 1990’s; FOX/Syndication (airing of radio show) late 1990’s; E! Television (airing of radio show) late 1990’s-mid 2000’s. Currently has an entire channel of various content on In Demand Networks.
•   Constant government pressure and increasing amount of commercials (up to 26 minutes an hour) stifled the creativity and banter of his show towards the end of his FM run.
•   Dropped from Clear Channel stations shortly before election time in 2004 supposedly due to indecency, but more likely due to his anti-Bush stance.
•   From the time he announced his move to Sirius in 2004 to the end of 2005, Sirius subscriptions jumped from 650,000 to over 3.3 million, closing the gap on competitor XM.

Stern’s Free FM Replacements

Stern’s former employers, Infinity Broadcasting (now CBS Radio), in response to losing their cash cow, have devised a multi-pronged attack to replace Stern based on the advice of Daily Show anchor Jon Stewart, whom they had tapped to take over Stern’s Empire. After Stewart turned them down he said that they shouldn’t try to replace Stern outright, because there was no way it would work with anyone. Thusly CBS decided to split up the former Stern affiliates between 4 acts. I have listened to large chunks of their shows via podcasts (hey I’ve got Sirius and listen to Stern in the mornings), and here is my take on each.

1.   David Lee Roth
Can Be Heard On: 92.3 FM NYC, 94.1 FM Philadelphia, 105.3 FM Dallas, 104.1 FM Boston, 98.5 FM Cleveland, 93.7 FM Pittsburgh, 103.1 FM West Palm Beach FL 6-10am EST

I decided to get the worst of the Free FM litter out of the way first. Roth’s act is tired and hasn’t been relevant for 20 years. On his debut show he had his Octogenarian uncle on as a guest for about 90 minutes, which was about 89.5 minutes too long. Before he started he claimed he would be cutting edge and in your face, but in fact he this show has been lame and disjointed, not to mention a scrambled mess. Roth has trouble talking without resorting to that lame Vegas-lounge act bullshit of his. His phone calls are screened thoroughly to weed out the negative calls, which is a shame because it might spice things up and snap listeners out of a catatonic state. He told a female caller that she could ask him anything she wanted, and when she asked him who he was dating he refused to answer her question. At the very least he is not trying to copy to Stern format like many others have, but what we have is a major clusterfuck. To be fair he is just starting out and may improve, but I highly doubt it. Roth is a very dubious choice to replace Stern at his flagship station.

History
•   Former Lead Singer of MTS Inductees Van Halen.
•   First radio show host gig.

David Lee Roth Show 1/3/06-4/21/06 R.I.P

2.   Adam Carolla
Can Be Heard On: 97.1 FM Los Angeles, 101.5 FM Phoenix, 106.9 FM San Francisco, 101.1 FM Portland, 103.7 FM San Diego, 107.5 FM Las Vegas 5-10am PST


Unlike Roth, Carolla’s podcasts are broken up in short segments usually under 5 minutes (DLR’s are broken up by hours). Also unlike Roth, Carolla has previous radio experience and knows how to speak. With that said, can someone please explain to me why this asshole keeps on getting work? He is not all funny: not on the radio or television. His voice is so nasally and grating; I can’t imagine anyone sitting there for four hours straight listening to this fuck face go on and on in a monotone about such compelling topics as coffee (he likes Starbucks and the LA station provides the cheap stuff) and apples. Yes folks, apples! This jerk-off having any job at all, never mind a million jobs at once, proves that there is no God.

History
•   Began in radio when he answered an ad seeking a boxing instructor to train Jimmy Kimmel of the Kevin & Bean Morning Show on KROQ in Los Angeles. Eventually joined the show.
•   Co-Hosted unexplainably popular syndicated talk-show Loveline with Dr. Drew Pinsky, which became a show on MTV for five seasons.
•   Starred with fellow no-talent Kimmel on The Man Show and currently stars on shows such as Crank Yankers, Drawn Together, Too Late with Adam Carolla, and The Adam Carolla Project.

3.   Rover’s Morning Glory
Can Be Heard On: 105.9 FM Chicago, 92.3 FM Cleveland, 97.3 FM Cincinnati, 107.1 FM Columbus OH, 93X FM Memphis, 97.1 FM Detroit, 94.1 FM Rochester NY, 105.7 FM St. Louis 5-10am CST

Rover’s podcast resides somewhere between Roth and Carolla length-wise, coming in 10-15 minute chunks, and before I go any further it should be noted that Roth’s show is the only available in it’s entirety via podcast. It would be nice if Free FM had some uniformity as far as the podcasts go. Rover comes off as a very “lite” version of Howard Stern genetically spliced with that Doofus Larry the Cable Guy from Blue Collar TV. He has a mid-west/southern twang going on, which would prevent him from being a hit nationally. He got in trouble when he was stationed in Cleveland when he pretended to tie helium balloons to a cat and watch it float away. Concerned viewers called the local ASPCA, and they found out he did not actually go through with it. Of the Stern replacements Rover is the blatant rip-off, complete with a female “voice of reason” that does the news ala Stern’s Robin Quivers. As someone who has listened to Stern for years, this imitation fell flat. He is better than Roth and Carolla though. He is the youngest of the Stern replacement, having not yet reached his 30th birthday.


History
•   Started out as a music DJ at 107.5 FM in Las Vegas before moving on to such markets as Knoxville TN, Denver, and Seattle.
•   Recruited for a now-defunct syndication network based out of Los Angeles, his first all-talk show.
•   Moved to 92.3 FM Cleveland, and moved his home base to Chicago in 2006.

Off the air in Chicago as of 8/1/06

4.   The Junkies
Can Be Heard On: 106.7 FM Washington DC, 105.7 FM Baltimore 5-10am EST

The Junkies is a group of four guys (nicknamed Cakes, EB, Lurch and JP) with a sports-oriented show in the DC/Baltimore area. They rely on heavy usage of some really stupid made-up lingo that would confuse a first-time listener. I had to do some searching to find out just what the fuck these guys were saying. Highlights of these phrases include:
Donkeys (dumb people, people they don’t like)
Silly (a pretty woman)
Bitties (a woman’s breasts)
Hurting (a loser, as in “He’s such a hurting”)

If you’re still with me congrats are in order. Their podcast are in the 15-20 range, and a very regionalized. I sincerely hope they have no aspirations of branching out, because anyone not into DC/Baltimore sports would be as bored as I was. Putting that aside, these guys are just awful. Their humor is lower than grade-school, including using the names of sports figures to describe body parts (ex: a “Clinton Portis” is a clitoris). They are apparently popular down there, but I can’t figure out why.

History
•   Started off with a public access TV show in Bowie, MD in 1995.
•   Got their first radio gig at WJFK (Now Free FM) in Washington on weekends, eventually moving to weeknights.
•   Moved to the morning drive spot at 99.1 FM Washington DC. Left after station changed formats.
•   Returned to WJFK, working the afternoon drive.
•   Switched to mornings in DC and Baltimore after Stern went to Sirius.

5.   Penn Jillette
Can Be Heard On: 92.3 FM NYC, 106.9 FM San Francisco, 97.1 FM Detroit, 103.7 FM San Diego, 105.9 FM Chicago, 106.7 FM Washington DC, 105.7 FM Baltimore 2-3pm EST

Jillette is not really a Stern replacement due to the late time slot and one-hour time frame, but he joined the Free FM stable at the same time the others did. It’s a shame Jillette is only on for an hour because he is the best of the Free FM personalities by far, but the show can get boring when he talks about magic. Listening to Jillette and being a fan of Penn & Teller: Bullshit!, I believe he is better suited for satellite where he would be free of FCC restrictions. His atheist and libertarian views are a major appeal to yours truly.

History
•   Larger, talkative part of the magic-comedy team Penn & Teller.
•   Has written 5 books, 2 of which made the best-seller list.
•   Co-hosted 4 Television shows, including the excellent Penn & Teller: Bullshit! (2003-current).
•   Co-creator and executive producer of the movie The Aristocrats.
•   First Radio hosting gig.

Other Prominent Shows

Stern and the Free-FM posse are not your only choices in radio listening. There are literally thousands of DJ’s you can choose from, including many Stern imitators. Hell, you can choose nothing all! Listed below are three prominent radio shows that I have sampled in one way or another.

1.   Opie & Anthony
Can Be Heard On: XM Satellite Radio Ch. 202 (High Voltage) 7-11am EST

I’m going to start this one off by saying these guys have a big following. It’s not as big as Stern’s, but impressive nonetheless. I have listened to quite a few podcasts of these guys (I’m already paying for Sirius, I’m not gonna pay for XM too just to hear these jerk-offs) and it is quite apparent that they have a very unhealthy obsession with Howard Stern. They spend an ample amount of time knocking Stern and seem hell-bent on destroying him. Unfortunately for O&A, as big as they are, they are not even a pimple on Stern’s ass. This comes from a gag order imposed by their former employees Infinity Broadcasting against all Infinity employees (including Stern) mentioning and knocking Stern or any other Infinity talent on air. O&A claim this order was imposed by Stern himself, but a little web surfing and common sense reveals that Infinity imposed the order to protect their assets. O&A claim to have been innovators of such ideas as WOW (whip-em Out Wednesdays) in which they encourage women to expose their breasts to any car with an O&A WOW sticker. Of course this kind of bit has been done repeatedly over the years, a variation of “honk when you see our car and get $50”. Another great O&A “innovation” is AOTM: Assault on the Media, in which the duo encourages their fans to disrupt live media events promoting the show. This includes a stunt when a fan blew an airhorn directly into the ear of a reporter doing a live newscast. The reporter may have suffered critical hearing damage; at the time I am writing this it is currently unknown.

Another “stunt” was the Million Pest March. O&A enlisted fans to infiltrate the massive crowd during the 12/16 Howard Stern Rally to celebrate his final day on old-fashioned radio and his move to XM rival Sirius. They had initially estimated that 1000 “pests” would show up to cause trouble, but in the end the number was closer to 75 and O&A declared the stunt a bust while on the air. BURN! Bitches.

History
•   Opie started on WBAB FM in Long Island
•   Anthony was a member of a band that sent in an OJ Simpson parody to Opie’s show who later joined the show himself.
•   Left WBAB after management refused to move the show its late-night spot to either early-morning or afternoon drive, the most listened to time periods in radio.
•   Moved to WAAF in Boston until fired for an April Fools Day prank in which they announced that the mayor of Boston died in a car accident while vacationing in Florida.
•   Moved to WNEW in NYC in the afternoon drive slot, becoming the #1 rated show in their time slot.
•   Syndicated to 26 markets at their peak via Infinity Broadcasting.
•   Hosted a short-lived pre-game show for Vince McMahon’s short-lived XFL football league. The pre-game show did not last the entire season that the XFL was in existence.
•   Removed from the airwaves in 2002 by Infinity for a contest which involved a couple having sex in St. Patrick’s Cathedral and broadcasting it on air.
•   Waited out their Infinity contract and signed with XM in 2004.


2.   Mancow
Can Be Heard On: 101.1 FM Chicago, 570 AM Los Angeles, 97.5 FM Salt Lake City, 93.5/95.3 FM Champaign IL, 105.1 FM Marion/Carbondale IL, 96.5 FM Peoria IL, 104.1 FM Wausau WI, 96.1 FM Norfolk VA, 94.3 FM Knoxville TN, 102.9 FM Florence SC, 93.3 FM Little Rock ARK, 105.3 FM Joplin MO, 97.3 FM Kansas City MO, 106.7 FM Springfield MO, 98.5 FM Windsor MO, 103.3 FM Des Moines IA, 100.3 FM Boise ID, 106.3 FM Medford OR, 1330 AM Tuscon AZ, 103.7 FM Fresno CA 5:30-10am CST

The list of stations that Mancow is on via syndication may be impressive at first glance, but further inspection shows that most of these stations are in the middle of bumfuck nowhere. He failed miserably in Detroit, and despite his claims to be bigger than Stern his show has never been aired in NYC or the east coast for that matter. Even his LA station is in AM and he gets very low ratings out there. The vast majority of the places listed above never had Stern on the air while he was on old-fashioned radio.  A Stern imitator who has gotten into a war of words with Howard himself, he set out to dethrone the King of All Media but was unsuccessful. In the same vain of Rush Limbaugh and Bill O’Reilly, Mancow sells a lot of useless shit through his website. The podcasts that I have listened to have revealed Mancow to be nothing but a pale imitation of Stern, despite his rants to the contrary. Another loser who is obsessed with Stern like O&A, Mancow claims he does not want to move to satellite, but I know he would jump if offered. This jackass has named himself the King of Free Media in an attempt to knock Stern and his move to satellite.
History
•   Started out in Monteray CA before moving to San Francisco.
•   Tied up traffic on the LAX in 1993 for a radio stunt.
•   Repeated incident on SF/Oak freeway and was prosecuted.
•   Moved to 103.5 FM in Chicago in 1994.
•   Moved to 101.1 FM in Chicago in 1998.

3.   Bubba the Love Sponge
Can Be Heard On: Sirius Satellite Radio Ch. 101 (Howard 101) 4-8pm EST

Bubba the Love Sponge is an honest, refreshing show, although at times it can get a bit too redneck for my tastes. The show features funny song parodies and bits, and Bubba (who not only trademarked the name but also legally changed his name from Todd Clem to Bubba the Love Sponge Clem) and his crew have great chemistry. Bubba is close friends with Hulk Hogan and race car driver Tony Stewart, who often appear on his show. He is the second highest cumulatively fined radio personality of all time ($1 million). Notorious for giving oral sex to porn stars on the air, this is one of the things that separate this lunatic redneck from Stern.  He has stated that he believes 2005 was a quiet year for the FCC because it was not an election year and expects business to pick up in 2006. I do not know much about Bubba and his show (aside from the research), having only listened to his show the past two days on Sirius, but so far so good.

History
•   Started out as Top 40 DJ, working in places like Philadelphia, Milwaukee, Orlando, and Tampa Bay.
•   Began in the all-talk genre at WXTB in Tampa Bay, where he became a huge ratings success.
•   Arrested in 2001 along with two hunters after the hunters slaughtered a pig on air during an event called “Bubba’s Road Kill Barbeque”.
•   Began syndication in 2001 to stations in Jacksonville, Orlando, West Palm Beach and Ft. Myers FL, Shreveport LA, Witchita KS, Macon GA, Hartford CT, and XM Satellite Radio through Clear Channel Communications.
•   Fired by Clear Channel in 2004 shortly after Janet Jackson Super Bowl incident and shortly before Clear Channel removed Stern from its stations that carried him. Virtually blacklisted from old-fashioned radio afterwards.
•   Brought to Sirius by Stern after two-year hiatus. One time competitors, Stern and Bubba buried the hatchet due to the government persecution they both endured.

So there you have it, my primer into the murky depths of Morning Drive Radio. As you can see from my reviews most of these guys suck elephant balls, and so do most of the thousands of other schmucks out there. Of course this primer only covers the “shock-jock” (I hate that term) genre, and there are many different genres to pick from on old-fashioned and especially satellite radio. If you don’t like any of these guys, by means change the channel or turn off the fucking radio. Do not complain to the government and expect them to take these choices away from the people who want to listen to them however. If you don’t want your kids listening to them (even though all of these shows have next to no listeners under 18) then try parenting your kids yourself instead of waiting for Uncle Sam to do it for you. Otherwise, fuck off.

PS: I know I mentioned doing an article on the Yankees after my last one, but I’ve decided to hold off on that one until baseball season.

[shemps#1]

Tough Crowd: Listeners Tune Out Howard Stern's Successors
02.28.2006 12:26 PM EST

According to early ratings released Monday, former Stern stations suffered serious drops in listenership.

The early results are in, and a good number of former Howard Stern listeners appear to have jumped to other pursuits in the morning. Based on preliminary numbers released by Arbitron for winter 2006 (November 2005-January 2006), stations featuring Stern's successors — David Lee Roth, Adam Carolla and Rover — have suffered serious drops in listenership.

According to an analysis of the numbers released Monday by trade magazine Radio & Records, New York's WFNY (92.3 Free FM) earned a 3.2 share (a share is the percentage of listeners tuning in to a broadcast in relation to all the people tuned in to that city's radio stations at that time) in November and 3.7 in December during Stern's final months. By January, Roth's first full month, the share had dipped by nearly two-thirds, according to Arbitron. Those numbers ranked the station at #18 in the nation's biggest radio market, compared to Stern's #1 slot in November and December. In other words, Roth attracted an estimated 63,000 listeners per quarter hour in January, versus Stern's 277,000 in December.

The news wasn't much better for Los Angeles' KLSX (97.1 Free FM), where Carolla's show attracted a dismal 0.7 share in January, making KLSX the lowest-rated full-signal commercial FM station in the market during morning-drive time for the month, according to R&R. Even at his lowest finish, in March 2005, Stern's old show got a 2.9 share. Radio ratings are typically based on a three-month cycle, so the early Arbitron numbers are not necessarily indicative of the final ratings the shows will have.

While Roth's show got off to a bumpy start and was heavily panned in the New York press, experts have praised Carolla as having the most significant chance of drawing in Stern's former audience due to his experience in radio and similar sensibility (see "Stern On Satellite: As Fans Scramble For Equipment, We Rate The Winners And Losers"). The same can't be said for former Cleveland morning-show host Rover, whose program on a handful of former Stern stations in the Midwest has suffered even greater declines, according to R&R.

Rover's results in Chicago are practically off the chart. His WCKG (105.9 Free FM) show received a 0.4 rating in January and just a 0.2 in the 25-54 age range.

CBS Radio executives have said all along that they don't envision any quick fix for replacing Stern and that they are committed to the Free FM format and the patchwork quilt of hosts they've hired to take over the shock jock's former slots (see "David Lee Roth Replacing Howard Stern On Morning Radio").

In the weeks after the debut of Roth, Carolla and Rover, Infinity Broadcasting (now CBS Radio) President of Programming Rob Barnett said it could take up to 18 months for the new hosts to find their footing. "One programmer said to me if the Lord had replaced Howard Stern, the first 24 hours would produce nothing but negative comments," Barnett joked at the time, saying the company plans to stick with the shows as they develop an audience.

"It's far too soon to draw any permanent conclusions based on these preliminary numbers," CBS Radio spokesperson Karen Mateo said. "We continue to have a long-range outlook for the Free FM stations and expect it to take anywhere between 12 to 24 months to see how it all plays out." Mateo added that the network has no current plans to add or subtract shows from the lineup.

The Arbitron ratings from R&R are unofficial monthly "extrapolations," with the official numbers expected next month. Stern began his new show on Sirius satellite radio in January, and due to the subscriber-based nature of the satellite business, pure ratings are not available. The company did report, however, that its subscriber base ballooned from around 600,000 on the day the Stern deal was announced in October 2004 to more than 3 million as of January 5, with more than 1.1 million signing on in the fourth quarter of 2005 alone.

— Gil Kaufman

http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1525039/20060228/stern_howard.jhtml?headlines=true&rsspartner=rssYahooNewscrawler

[shemps#1]

(This is the article that is referred to in the middle of the previous article I just posted.)


   
Stern On Satellite: As Fans Scramble For Equipment, We Rate The Winners And Losers
01.10.2006

Howard Stern and Adam Carolla come out winners, while fans may lose.

If you were scrambling last weekend looking for a Sirius radio to hook up for Howard Stern's satellite debut on Monday, like a lot of Americans, you were out of luck. That's because so many people have made a mad dash over the past month to buy equipment that stores can't keep product on the shelves, despite a year's warning about the move.

What you missed was, well, classic Stern, minus the bleeps. Stern vowed to keep the cursing to a minimum, but he and his crew — including first-week guest announcer and frequent punching bag, former "Star Trek" actor George Takei — use words you won't hear on terrestrial radio more than 120 times during the first five-hour broadcast.

Kicking off with the theme from "2001: A Space Odyssey" accompanied by the kind of fart noises he claimed he wasn't allowed to play on his previous radio show, Stern launched a new era in satellite radio's short history, one that some experts say has already changed the face of broadcasting.

RadioShack, the retail leader in Sirius Satellite sales, reported a "dramatic" run on inventory at every store, and spokesperson Jessica A. Stüdy said the electronics chain's targets and goals were "crushed" during the fourth quarter of 2005 due to high demand for Sirius products. While the company does not release sales figures, Stüdy said "Shipments have moved to a weekly replenishment rate to keep up with this increasing demand," and the retailer expects sales to continue to ramp up throughout this year.

Similarly, Circuit City spokesperson Amanda Tate said nobody in the industry was caught off guard by the intense last-minute rush before Stern's satellite debut. The 630-store chain, which also does not divulge sales figures, has had trouble keeping Sirius equipment stocked because Tate said manufacturers simply couldn't keep up with demand. "All I can say is, sales are significantly above expectations," Tate said, adding that a number of stores were sold out of Sirius equipment prior to Stern's debut.

According to a Sirius spokesperson, the satellite company — which trails industry leader XM by almost 3 million subscribers — has ballooned from around 600,000 subscribers from the day the Stern deal was announced in October 2004 to 3.3 million as of January 5 — with more than 1.1 million signing on in the fourth quarter of 2005. "I can tell you anecdotally that a lot of stores are reporting sales through the roof, and places are sold out," said Elise Brown, who explained that the company does not reveal sales figures or individual channel audience numbers.

Stern — who in addition to signing a deal reportedly valued at $500 million recently received stock worth an additional $220 million because subscriptions had exceeded targets — and Sirius are clearly on a winning streak. But how are the men who replaced Stern — former Van Halen rocker David Lee Roth, comedian Adam Carolla and little-known Cleveland DJ Rover — faring after one week on the air (see "David Lee Roth Replacing Howard Stern On Morning Radio")? Though Roth has gotten almost universally negative notices for a show that some have called rambling and unfocused, Rob Barnett, the president of programming for Infinity Broadcasting (which is owned by MTV's parent company, Viacom) said it's way too early to make a judgment — especially since the first ratings book won't hit until April.

"If you go to Google right now and enter FreeFM, David Lee Roth, Adam Carolla, Penn Jillette or Rover, you will see that there is more noise about new radio shows than I've seen in decades," Barnett said. "That's a unique moment in radio that was caused by a change we've all had to face as fans and broadcasters. And just like it's not healthy to judge a movie that has taken years to create on its first weekend, in radio you have to form a relationship with a personality, and that doesn't happen in a day."

Barnett said it could take up to 18 months for the new hosts to get their footing, and though he expected the negative press ("one programmer said to me if the Lord had replaced Howard Stern, the first 24 hours would produce nothing but negative comments"), he said the company is committed to the shows.

What does the future hold for Stern on satellite, which, like cable depends on subscribers, not ratings, to survive? And who's winning the battle for listener's ears on terrestrial radio? Let's take a look at the winners and losers so far:

Winners:

    * Stern: He's got the money, the listeners, the intense media heat and — for the first time in decades — he's got the FCC off his back.


    * Sirius: The #2 satellite company has experienced explosive growth and reams of press surrounding Stern's debut.


    * Infinity: Sure, much of the press has been bad, but clearly many millions of Stern fans haven't migrated to Sirius, which means Infinity can try to win them back with their FreeFM talk/music format. "If three weeks from now, millions of people are complaining that these guys are terrible, that means millions of people are listening," said Talkers magazine publisher Michael Harrison. "The goal is not to have them say they're good, but to have them listen."


    * Sirius product manufacturers and retailers: Though a Pioneer spokesperson wouldn't comment (the company makes both XM and Sirius gear), manufacturers including Alpine and retailers such as Best Buy and RadioShack are pleased with the empty shelves and high demand.


    * Adam Carolla
      : He's got the guests, the bits and the quick wit that will remind folks of Stern, plus he'd already proven himself as a radio host on the long-running advice show "Loveline." "He has the most natural instincts," said Talkers publisher Harrison.



Losers

    * Procrastinators: With Sirius gear hard to find, some hard core Stern fans will either have to wait to get on line or pay through the nose on sites like eBay.


    * Stern: For the time being, he seemingly has it all, but he's also got a potential audience that's a mere fraction of his former 16 million listeners. And without the FCC to complain about, will he run out of the righteous indignation that has fueled him for the past 20 years?


    * David Lee Roth: "It's very early and the shows haven't developed into what they will become, but all the radio people I've talked to have said Roth is a disaster so far," said Steven Strick, rock formats editor for Radio & Records magazine — who admits that he hasn't heard Roth's show himself. Strick said the real problem is that it's impossible to replace Stern, and though Roth could turn things around, Carolla has the best chance to succeed. Tom Taylor, editor of the trade journal Inside Radio (which is owned by Infinity rival Clear Channel), said Roth still needs to "figure out who he is. We know he's a singer, but he needs to explore his radio talent and that's hard to do in front of the biggest audience in the country."


    * Rover: The headline in The Detroit News last week was, "Stern Replacement Rover Practically Plays Dead In Local Debut". The little known Cleveland morning host, who was tapped to play in five Midwest markets, has a conservative bent, no big name guests so far, a predictable menagerie of "wacky" sidekicks and little original comedic material. It's the same "Morning Zoo" format you can find up and down the dial across the country.


    * Former Stern listeners: Unless they want to invest in equipment and shell out another $150 a year for a subscription, listeners have to find a new morning fix.



— Gil Kaufman

http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1520491/01102006/id_0.jhtml

[Pilsner Panther]

Personally, I think that Howard (and he be homeboy, I like him) peaked about five or six years ago. I know I'm opening myself up for a lot of static by saying so, but I always used to listen to Stern when he was on in the early morning, and now I don't.

Especially if I have to pay to hear him. This is sort of like the N.Y. Times, which recently started charging for content (particularly Op-Ed columns) that used to be free online.

The Times's Op-Ed writers aren't any better than I am at that sort of thing, and I'd certainly never think of charging people to read my bloviated fulminations in some fishwrap newspaper. I could outwrite Bob Herbert or Maureen Dowd any day of the week, but now I have to pay to read them? Feh... I refuse.

Sometimes, a move or a change loses you some audience members... or nearly does. Right, Rob?

[shemps#1]

Well I'm not going to give you any "static", you're entitled to your own opinion.

I happen disagree, which is why I pay for him now. I think the show has gotten even better on Sirius and is well worth the money.

[Pilsner Panther]

Well I'm not going to give you any "static", you're entitled to your own opinion.

I happen to disagree, which is why I pay for him now. I think the show has gotten even better on Sirius and is well worth the money.

Don't get me wrong, Jim, I'm tempted. However, what the %$*?!/# ever happened to the First Amendment? Now, if you want to hear uncensored speech or watch an uncensored TV show on the airwaves, you have to pay for the "privilege?"

I don't blame Howard in the least for taking his show to Sirius. The last FCC Comissioner, Michael Powell (Colin Powell's son) was absolutely determined that the U.S. Government would have the last word on whatever went out over the air.

Sort of like Will Hays (see "No Census, No Feeling"), this has all happened before. I suppose it'll keep on happening, because there's never any shortage of these complete putzes who want to tell everyone what to do, or what they can watch or listen to. That's not America, as I've always understood it.

It's great to know that we're in such competent hands...

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[Dunrobin]

I agree with both of you about the censorship issue, even though I hate Howard Stern.  Personally, I can't stand him or his act.  I think he is just an overly crude, obnoxious and annoying putz, and even his voice grates on my nerves.

But I've never worried about it because I am quite capable of changing to a different station, or just turning the  radio off, and not listening to the putz.  I don't need to resort to force to ignore the guy, and since I don't want anyone else to assert a "right" to shut me up, I can't assert the "right" to do it to somebody else.

[Dunrobin]

It's great to know that we're in such competent hands...

"Are you sure you're competent?"  "Soitenly!  We're all incompetent!"   

[shemps#1]

Pils: I agree wholeheartedly. It does suck that I have to pay for the "privilege" of hearing the First Amendment rights we are supposedly guaranteed in this country used freely. I thought about it for awhile, and decided that I was a big enough fan of Stern's and it is relatively cheap (it rounds out to roughly 43 cents a day). It appears as though that the nutjobs in DC want to regulate pay radio just like free radio, but I don't see that happening.

Rob: Very good and simple point that some people just can't seem to grasp. If you don't like Howard Stern, or whomever else, turn them off and let the people who do like them listen/watch them in peace.

Kudos for everyone!

[shemps#1]

(Apparently Roth is already done. Talk about a sacrificial lamb, they never gave the guy a chance.)

Report: Opie & Anthony To Replace David Lee Roth
April 20, 2006

News reports are suggesting that a deal has been finalized for XM Satellite Radio's Opie & Anthony and the show's third star Jim Norton to replace David Lee Roth on CBS Radio's Free-FM outlets, posssibly within the next two weeks. A deal is supposedly being worked out by CBS's Joel Hollander and XM's Hugh Panero that would bring O&A to WFNY/New York, WYSP/Philadelphia and WBCN/Boston. All three markets are former O&A outlets. Roth was still on the air this morning.

Other Roth outlets include KLLI/Dallas,  WNCX/Cleveland, WRKZ/Pittsburgh and WPBZ/West Palm Beach. It is unclear if O&A would appear in those markets.

O&A skirted the subject at the start of their program today and would not directly address the rumor, other than mocking Howard Stern's coverage of the news on his Sirius program earlier this morning.

The move by CBS Radio will surely annoy Stern, especially since The Wall Street Journal is reporting O&A "would promote XM on air to CBS's listeners." Stern is admittedly not a fan of Opie & Anthony and recently came clean regarding the long-rumored gag order he had Mel Karmazin place on the duo when both parties were employed by Infinity Broadcasting. Also, since arriving at Sirius Satellite Radio, Stern has stepped up his attack and on-air disparagement of the XM personalities compared to his days on terrestrial radio when he barely mentioned them and treated them as more of an after-thought.

O&A will continue to be heard on XM's High Voltage channel 202 from 7am - 11am, with a cleaned up version airing on CBS Radio. The duo's XM show, while sometimes crossing into FCC objectionable material, has generally been clean for terrestrial radio's airwaves, barring some curse words that will need to be edited out of the program.

Earlier this year, O&A held a "Super Ball" contest with three male contestants going through different forms of genital torture, including an "ultimate challenge" where a contraption filled with bees and wasps was connected to the contestants' scrotum. While one radio station recently copied the contest, this type of material might not fly in the new FCC-driven world of clean content on the nation's airwaves. O&A were last on terrestrial radio in a fulltime capacity before the Janet Jackson breast-baring incident.

A call to a CBS Radio spokesperson has gone unreturned at this time.

This may seem like a quick fix for CBS Radio, but will this reignite the Roman Catholic League candle of outrage and make this marriage more trouble than it's worth?  Also, with already diminished ratings and less commercials than during the Howard Stern days, will Free-FM be one boycott away from an even worse position than it was with Roth?

http://www.fmqb.com/article.asp?id=203624

[shemps#1]

(There you go, they officially killed the David Lee Roth SHow before the first Arbitron Ratings Book for the show came out ((ARB is kind of like a report card)). What this story doesn't cover is apparently they fired him while the show was still on, and the last twenty minutes were nothing but music.)


It's official: David Lee Roth exits radio

Associated Press
Apr. 21, 2006 11:16 AM

NEW YORK - Well, that didn't take long.

Rocker-turned-radio host David Lee Roth, who accepted the no-win task of replacing ratings king Howard Stern in January, was bounced from the airwaves Friday after barely three months on the air in New York, Philadelphia, Boston and four other markets.

"I was booted, tossed, and it's going to cost somebody," Roth said on his last show, intimating that his lawyers would go after CBS Radio for the full compensation due from his reported $4 million contract. The timing of the move was interesting: It arrived just days before the Roth show's first Arbitron numbers.
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CBS Radio spokeswoman Shavonne Harding said the company would have an announcement soon on its plans. She declined any other comment, and would not say who will replace the former Van Halen frontman on Monday's morning drive time shift.

Roth said he was only told about the syndicated show's demise while riding in a car to the WFNY-FM studios in Manhattan.

His replacements, in a hiring fraught with bizarre subplots, will be shock jocks Greg "Opie" Hughes and Anthony Cumia - currently available only to the 6.5 million listeners on XM satellite radio.

"Apparently we can talk about it now. So much for keeping a lid on this," the pair said Friday on their show's Web site. "The Opie and Anthony show will be replacing David Lee Roth in several markets on CBS Radio Free-FM stations."

Opie and Anthony's syndicated show was yanked from terrestrial radio in August 2002 after airing a live account of listeners having sex in St. Patrick's Cathedral. The company that silenced the duo was the same one that just hired them back, CBS Radio.

It also puts the pair in the slot long dominated by Stern, who feuded with Opie and Anthony for years before leaving for Sirius Satellite Radio. And it reverses the trend of satellite looting traditional radio for talent. Instead, CBS Radio is reaching out to satellite radio for syndicated programming.

"What they're doing is switching to a proven act," said Tom Taylor, editor of the trade publication Inside Radio. "This is a group with a pedigree. I would think the stations involved are very happy about this."

There is no word on when the Opie and Anthony show will debut on CBS Radio. The Associated Press was told the pair will do three hours on both XM and CBS, and two additional hours exclusively for the satellite audience.

In addition to New York, Boston and Philadelphia, Opie and Anthony will reportedly air in Pittsburgh, Cleveland, West Palm Beach, Fla., and Dallas.

Further proof of how strange the O&A move was: Bill Donohue of the Catholic League, who demanded the pair's dismissal after the St. Patrick's scandal, issued a statement wishing the pair well.

"(They've) made it clear they regretted the St. Patrick's stunt," said Donohue, who appeared as a guest on the pair's XM show. "In short, the Catholic League hopes Opie and Anthony have a great run on CBS Radio."

---

On the Net:

Opie and Anthony, www.foundrymusic.com

http://www.azcentral.com/business/articles/0421roth-radio21-ON.html

[JazzBill]

Living in Chicago, I've been blessed with that guy Rover. What a waste of time he turned out to be. You were wrong about one thing though Shemps#1. He's not a Stern wanna be, he's a Mancow wanna be. Talk about setting the bar low.You were right on about Mancow though. He says he's all about " Free Speech" and fighting the "suits" and how he's on the side of the" little guy". Well, a few years ago, he was working at another station here in Chicago. You should of seen how fast he bolted when a new station came along and offered him more money. Whatta guy.....Like you mentioned, Mancow and Stern used to go at it all the time.That was good radio, Stern used to tear him up pretty good. A couple of times Mancow would try to put out the "olive branch" and stick up for Stern when he was having FCC problems. But Stern still ripped on him. I loved it.

[shemps#1]

The funny thing about Roth getting canned is Rover and Corolla are doing just as bad as DLR was, if not worse.

Granted I do not live in a "Rover area", so I haven't been "blessed" with the ability to listen to his show on a regular basis. Even if I did I wouldn't bother since I've got Sirius, but from what I did listen to in researching this article he is a Stern rip-off, complete with a newslady who is the "voice of reason", or in other words a direct rip-off of Robin Quivers. I heard that he recently even stole a bit from Howard Stern in having one of his crew members getting a Brazil Wax on air. It wouldn't surprise me if Rover himself has Sirius and listens for shit to rip off. He certainly wouldn't be the first. Calling a rip-off of Mancow is even worse since Mr. Mueller is no-talent Stern rip-off himself, only with a stupid "Morning Zoo" feel.

The bad blood between Stern and Mancow can be traced back to when Mancow sent a package full of human feces to Stern's offices. The package was opened by a female intern who was apparently pretty shaken up. It was after this incident that Stern launched his attack on Mancow, saying that he would skull-fuck Mancow's father's corpse. Mancow responded by sending Stern a severed cow's head in a package and the war has been ever since (mostly in Mancow's mind as Stern has transcended the industry like no other).

Outside of Chicago and surrounding areas Mancow has been a huge flop, and mostly avoided going head-to-head with Stern when Stern was on testitcular radio. The only other places besides Chicago that Mancow and Stern aired at the same time were Detroit (always a tough market for Stern, but Mancow did so poor he was dropped) and Los Angeles (Stern was #1, destroying Mancow in the process).

I also wanted my two cents to the whole Roth/O&A thing. I think this is a bad deal all around. Roth loses because he was never given a chance, but I would expect to show up on Stern's show as a guest soon. CBS radio loses because they are having the bite a bullet and hire two guys that they suspended and made sure were not on the air for two years, not to mention signing a deal with a satellite company that makes their lawsuit against Stern look even weaker. XM loses despite that plugs on CBS Radio because O&A are no longer exclusive to them no matter how you spin it. The whole adding two extra hours of O&A that will only run on XM is fucking rediculous. I know if Sirius struck a deal with someone to run Stern's show on free radio I'd be pissed after paying to hear on Sirius, no matter censored the show would be. O&A and their fans (let me correct my original article, O&A were never really big, but do have a strong cult following) lose also; despite the extra exposure and added listeners the first three hours of the show will suffer because of FCC regulations.

My prediction, O&A will fare better than Roth, but will not approach Stern's numbers.

[shemps#1]

(Well as I'm sure you know by now JB, Mancow has been shown the exit door in Chicago. Which is a bigger day in Chicago, the day the White Sox won the World Series or the day Q101 got rid of Manqueer?)

"Mancow" Exits Chicago's WKQX-FM

Katy Bachman

JULY 11, 2006 -

Following difficult negotiations with Emmis Communications, Mancow (Erich) Muller, morning man on WKQX-FM in Chicago since 1998, will be exiting the station July 14, Emmis announced Tuesday. Muller’s contract with Emmis expires on Aug. 25.

Emmis positioned the change as part of its plan to modify the format from Alternative Rock to Everything Alternative in order to appeal to a broader 18-49 audience. A new morning show for the station is in development and set for a Sept. 18 launch.

“We’ve decided that the time has come for us to develop a morning show that will better serve the needs and sensibilities of this audience,” said Marv Nyren, vp and general manager of Emmis Radio in Chicago.

But Mancow, claiming dominance among the Male 18-to-34 and 18-to-49 demographic, described a different story. The host of the now syndicated Mancow’s Morning Madhouse, announced Tuesday his intent to seek a new Chicago flagship “to expand my audience without interference.”

“I wish Emmis management didn’t frown on my relationship with Fox News Channel and my success in national syndication,” said Mancow who has appeared regularly on FNC’s morning TV program, Fox & Friends for the past seven years. “I’ve enjoyed working with Emmis, but they’ve wanted me to talk only about their narrow music world and related issues despite the fact that my track record and numbers are growing consistently as I broaden the subject matter of the show.”

In the recently-released Winter 2006 ratings, Mancow’s morning show was the highest-rated daypart on the station among Persons 12 and older. The show was ranked third among 18-34-year-olds and No. 6 among the 18-49 demo. According to Mancow’s press release, the show brought in about $7 to $10 million annually for the station, about half of the station’s annual revenue.

Despite its change of format in April 2005, WKQX hasn’t moved up in the ratings, still ranked No. 21 with a 1.9 overall audience share.

http://mediaweek.com/mw/news/tvstations/article_display.jsp?vnu_content_id=1002803340&&imw=Y

Now with that out of the way, for your listening enjoyment I present to you two recordings of the same phone call, courtesy of sternfannetwork.com. Awhile back Stern and Mancow had a "confrontation" over the airwaves of both of their shows. The first clip is from the Howard Stern Show side of things, the second is from Mancow's Morning Madhouse. Oh, and if you are wondering who's doing the muting and who hung up first listen closely to the Stern recording for the Mancow sycophants clapping out of nowhere, both times, and remember when you hear the "hang-up" on Mancow's show (if that just made any sense).




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[JazzBill]

I didn't even know he was in a contract dispute because I never listened to him. But I'm glad they finally put the Cow out to pasture. I bet the other ass-hole, Rover, was glad too. He's just as bad as Mancow. He was supposed to be the replacement for Stern. But he isn't doing any good at all. But he probably will pick up a lot of Mancows listeners.

[shemps#1]

Well it's a good news/bad news scenario for you and the other members in the Chicago area, JB. Rover and his horrible show are done in Chicago, but Opie and Anthony and their Stern bashing fest are taking his spot:

   
Robert Feder
Dismal ratings put Rover in doghouse

July 31, 2006

BY ROBERT FEDER Television/Radio Columnist

It's over for Rover.

One of the biggest bombs in Chicago radio history -- the morning show hosted by Shane "Rover" French -- is about to be replaced by the New York-based syndicated duo of Gregg "Opie" Hughes and Anthony Cumia.

CBS Radio is expected to pull the plug today on "Rover's Morning Glory" after eight months of microscopic ratings on WCKG-FM (105.9), the "Free FM" talk outlet.

Although today will be his last day on the air in Chicago, French is expected to continue in about a dozen other markets, including his former home base of Cleveland.

Duo fired over church sex show

French came here to replace Howard Stern, the self-styled "King of All Media," who signed off at the end of last year to move to Sirius Satellite Radio. French never caught on with the young male audience he was hired to attract -- or with anyone else, for that matter.

In the latest Arbitron quarterly survey, he plunged to a 0.3 percent share of men between the ages of 18 and 34, and was largely responsible for WCKG's finishing dead last among every major station in the market with an all-time low 0.9 share overall.

The ouster of Mancow Muller from Emmis Communications' alternative WKQX-FM (101.1) earlier this month offered French a brief glimmer of hope. Despite running print and television ads to capitalize on Mancow's demise, CBS Radio bosses ultimately concluded that the situation at WCKG was hopeless.

Starting Tuesday, WCKG will revamp its lineup throughout the day: From 5 to 6 a.m., highlights of Steve Dahl's show from the previous day will be followed by "Opie & Anthony" from 6 to 9 a.m.; Stan Lawrence and Terry Armour from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m.; the syndicated Penn Jillette from 1 to 2 p.m.; Dahl from 2 to 7 p.m., and Jim Cramer's syndicated financial show from 7 to 8 p.m.

"Opie & Anthony" made headlines in 2002 when they were fired for airing a couple having sex in a vestibule of New York's St. Patrick's Cathedral as part of a contest.

They resurfaced on XM Satellite Radio.

http://www.suntimes.com/output/feder/cst-nws-feder31.html

I also wanted to add, that despite the spin by CBS Radio, O&A's ratings have been poor thus far. Better than DLR's or Rover's (and Rover was worse than DLR), but still weak none-the-less. I have a feeling Chicago, which was a notoriously tough market for Howard Stern, will reject the clones.

[JazzBill]

Yeah, I read about it this morning. I tuned into his show this morning, just to see what he had to say. He pretty much blamed everything  on the "suits". They wouldn't let him run the show his way, etc.  With "Mancow" just getting booted, I'm suprised they didn't give "Rover" a little longer to see if he could pick up some of Mancows listeners. Supposedly they figured it was a lost cause.