We’re now heading into the final stretch with Abbott and Costello films, as ABBOTT AND COSTELLO GO TO MARS is the first film of the final contract they would sign with Universal. A somewhat controversial film, I have heard this referred to as the worst Abbott and Costello film when in my eyes it’s one of the best. I think this really boils down to a matter of taste. If your ideal version of Abbott and Costello is World War II era patriotism, swing music, romantic couples and burlesque routines, then yes, I can see why ABBOTT AND COSTELLO GO TO MARS might not be your cup of tea. As for me, I like the burlesque routines just fine but at this point they’ve all been used in the movies and are now being catalogued on the television show. The rest of that stuff I can do without. In it’s place we get a funny straight forward comic plot - in and of itself unusual for a Bud and Lou film - that involves surrealism, science fiction and a really cool looking planet filled with beautiful women and no men. Cult psychotronic cinema is way up my alley more than World War II America, so if you count yourself as someone who loves old horror and sci-fi in addition to the comic stylings of Bud and Lou, ABBOTT AND COSTELLO GO TO MARS should be perfect for you.
Lou plays a 38 year old living in an orphan home who gets stuck in the back of a truck driven by Bud. Bud drives Lou and the truck into his employer, some top secret government agency who is sporting a giant rocket ship. Bud and Lou get into the rocket ship, think they land on Mars when in reality they land in New Orleans during Mardi Gras where everybody is dressed up in outrageous costumes. They run into two bank robbers who end up on the rocket ship with Bud and Lou where they take flight once more. They land on Venus, which is inhabited by dozens upon dozens of attractive females who are four hundred years old and hold the key to eternal beauty - and no males. In other words, this movie is a lot of fun.
During the orphan home opening, it’s a lot of fun watching Lou interact with a bunch of kids who are his intellectual superior. Lou has a natural rapport with kids and the boy up front is billed as Harry Shearer. A nine year old at this point, someone with the same name would go on to voice characters on THE SIMPSONS, but this boy who go on to be the bass player Derek Smalls in Spinal Tap.
When Bud and Lou get to the government building, there is confusion with Lou and an important scientist. Lou’s character is named “Orville” while there is a doctor named Dr. Orvilla. The latter is played by Joe Kirk, who also played Mr. Bacciagalupe on Bud and Lou’s television show. Watching him and Lou argue over the name and who the true doctor is a definite highlight for sure - the yelling and the slapping is all very well timed and funny. Eventually, Bud and Lou land in the rocket ship and it’s also funny watching Bud trying to admonish child like Lou for touching the controls in the ship, which of course he launches. It’s a real trip watching the rocket fly through New York City and eventually landing in New Orleans.
I’ve heard people complain over the years about not landing on Mars but instead in Mardi Gras New Orleans. Bollocks, I think this is a real clever idea. Bud and Lou think they are on Mars because everybody they run into, being Mardi Gras, is wearing some bizarre costume. Folks, when I say bizarre, I mean bizarre, almost like a Salvador Dali fantasy world. Giant heads with vacant gazes that can spring up and twist around - beautiful women with duck heads - tons of bizarre stuff. I love the surrealism here and I love the way Bud and Lou get to react to all of this in their typical manner.
The only real portion of the film that strays away from Bud and Lou, and it’s not for that long, are the two bank robbers, played by Horace McMahon and Jack Kruschen. No worries, they’re almost, if not quite, as entertaining as Bud and Lou and eventually, the four meet up. A highlight with the robbers is they go into the rocket ship and steal some death ray guns which freeze people. They go into the bank and freeze everyone in a very entertaining scene. The gentlemen who gets frozen while his head is peeking out the door is none other than Dudley Dickerson! Always good to see Dudley.
So yes, Bud, Lou and the bandits eventually end up back in the rocket ship and go on a flight. Very entertaining when the gravity goes away, hearing their voices go low and watching a bullet fly out of a gun, only for it to slowly fall to the ground. As fun as everything is so far, the real highlight of the film is when the four land on planet Venus. The art direction looks real cool for starters, it’s just a real cool looking planet that will make any sci-fi fan happy. Eventually, Lou gets chased by a giant dog and lands in a cave that is inhabited by beautiful young women. Dozens, upon dozens of beautiful young women, wearing short shorts, boots, and skimpy tops. These young women are most played by recent Miss Universe contestants and one of them is even Anita Ekberg. But Stooge fans, even better than all of these beauties, the main guard of this all female society is played by Jean Willes, who gets plenty of screen time and lines. She’s fabulous here and it’s a real trip for this Stooge fan to see her amongst all the Miss Universe contestants. The beauty of these ladies is the point - that and the fact this beauty eventually find Lou Costello - of all people - irresistible and make him their king. The sight of Lou Costello in that kingly garb is comic in and of itself and the fact all these beautiful women want him make it even funnier. Lou, being a man amongst all that beauty, can’t stay faithful to the queen, so he and the crew get banished back to planet Earth where they are greeted as heroes. But yes, the whole Venus scene, which takes up about the last half hour of the film, is a camp masterpiece. The balloons that show Lou to be unfaithful, the curse that destroys the ladies eternal youth and watching one turn old with a kiss - great stuff! Plus again, two words - Jean Willes.
Yes, I like ABBOTT AND COSTELLO GO TO MARS a lot. This is a purely fun movie and to anybody who likes both old sci-fi and Bud and Lou, a must. I know this film is not everyone’s cup of tea, but it works just fine for me. Sci-fi, comedy, pretty girls and a plot that’s straight forward and always fun. No unwanted musical numbers and not a single part I want to fast forward. This movie rules.
