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The Three Stooges fan fiction

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Offline Shemp_is_Awesome78

 Hello, everybody! I'm new to this forum, and I just wanted to post these little Three Stooges stories I've created over the years. My first one is going to be called Party Gone Wrong, which is a remake of Half-Wits Holiday. I hope you like it, and if you do, let me know, because I'll post more.

Professor Quackenbush: I believe that..
Sedletz: You've shown me your theory many, many times, but you've never even proved it!
Professor Quackenbush: I'll prove it to you by Sunday!
Sedletz: Alright, and the bet?
Professor Quackenbush: That I can turn three no-good nitwits into gentlemen in time for the party on Sunday!
Sedletz: And, if you don't, I get to slap you!
( they shake hands)

( Meanwhile, The Three Stooges are encountering a man)
Man: The Three Stooges. Think you can go to that party on Sunday.
Curly: Yeah, and that's what we're going to do.
( Moe slaps Curly)
Moe: Leave the rough-talk to me!
Man: You'll ruin this party, and I know it.
( Man walks away)
Larry: How do you like that? A guy trying to waste our reputation!
( Professor Quackenbush comes)
Professor Quackenbush: Hey! Does that guy think you will ruin that party on Sunday?
Curly: Uh-huh. I say, " RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF!"
Professor Quackenbush: Well, I can make you not ruin that party if you come with me!
Moe: Oh, boy! C'mon, Curly and Larry! Let's go!

( At Quackenbush's house)
Quackenbush: Now, for your reading lesson! Larry, turn to page 1.
Larry: Oh, see the little cat. Does the cat have chickens?
Quackenbush: Kittens! A cat does NOT have chickens.
Larry: Oh, yeah? Well, my cat got into the chicken coop and my cat had chickens!
Quackenbush: Curly, turn to page 2.
Curly: ( reading gibberish)
( Moe slaps Curly)
Moe: What's the matter with you? ( flips the book over)
Curly: Oh, see the little deer. Does the deer have a little doe?
Moe: Yeah! Five bucks!
( Three Stooges laughing)
Quackenbush: UGH!

Moe: We're off to a good start!
Curly: Our debut into society will make history!
Moe: History of what?
Curly: " Most Men Angered at People." N'yuk, n'yuk, n'yuk!
( Moe slaps Curly)
Larry: Where's your dignity?
Moe: Right here.
( Moe slaps Larry)
Curly: But, he was a victim of soicumstance!
Moe: And, so are you!
( Moe slaps Curly)
Moe: Hey, here comes that guy who doubted us!
Larry: We'll show him a thing or two or three!
Moe: ( slaps Larry) Shet up.
Man: The party is tomorrow. Just don't blow it.
Curly: Oh, we won't blow it. We'll explode it! WOO WOO WOO WOO!
Moe: ( slaps Curly) Shet up.
Curly: We'll explode it so much the guests will be in flames.
Moe: ( slaps Curly 5 times) SHET UP!!!!!
Man: You are going to fail. I'll be laughing so hard at you three failing.
Moe: We'll be doing it the other way around at you.

( The Three Stooges are sleeping, when their triple bed bed collapses)
Curly: Man the lifeboats! Me and the women first!
Quackenbush: Today's the day!
Larry: ( half-asleep) I don't want to go to school and take the test.
( Moe slaps Larry)
Quackenbush: Don't let that man come in.
Moe: You know about him? He's been chasing us and giving us bad luck!
Larry: Here he comes now!
Man: Ah, Professor Quackenbush and The Three Stooges. What a party. What a party that will be ruined by you four!
Moe: Get out of here, and stay out!

( at the dinner table)
Quackenbush: Now, I'll be out. So, do whatever Miss Lulu does.
Larry: Boy, what a Lulu! A-hooooo!
( Moe slaps Larry)
Miss Lulu: ( puts on lipstick)
( Curly starts putting on lipstick)
Moe: What are you doing?
Curly: The professor said to do whatever she does!
Sappington: Hello, Moe, Larry, and Curly! I'm the butler, and I will serve you. Some olives or celery, Miss Lulu? ( holds out a fake plate of olives and celery)
Miss Lulu: Yes, please!
Sappington: Some celery, Larry?
( Larry takes fake celery)
Larry: I love celery! ( bites the fake celery, and it makes a crunching noise)
Curly: These olives are great! (puts the olives in , 5 at a time)
Larry: Stop goofing around, Curly! The party's tonight, and I'm excited!
Quackenbush: How did they do, Miss Lulu?
Miss Lulu: They did great!

( montage of them taking different lessons, until it changes to the Stooges in a taxi)
Curly: Hey, driver! Can you do this? RUFF RUFF RUFF! Can you do this? ( does tricks with his hand)
Driver: THIS IS NOT WHAT I  GET PAID FOR!!!!!!
Curly: Hey, driver.
Driver: WHAT?
Curly: If you don't get paid for  that, what do you get paid for?
Driver: YOU'RE GETTING ON MY NERVES!!!!
Curly: Is there a bathroom in here?
( Moe slaps Curly)
Moe: We're in a taxi. Does it look like it?
Driver: You're at your stop!

( The Stooges walk up to Miss Lulu)
Moe: You look charming!
Miss Lulu: You look charming, too! May I introduce you to Miss Smythe-Smythe?
Moe: Enchanted!
Larry: Enraptured!
Curly: Embalmed!
Miss Lulu: And, then there's Maddie Goodington!
Moe: Delighted!
Larry: Devastated!
Curly: CHAMPAGNE!
( Curly walks to champagne, walk to other room)
Moe: Where's the champagne?
Curly: I don't know...
( Moe kicks Curly's butt, and champagne sprays all over Larry)
Man: Well, you're off to a good start, but I know you're going to somehow ruin the party!
Larry: Look who's talking!
Man: You're going to get it for that!
( Man starts chasing 3 Stooges)
Moe: You may chase us, but wet! ( throws a bucket of water at the man)
Man: You haven't seen the last of me! ( walks away)
Curly: Miss Lulu, remember the man? Well, he was chasing us around and then Moe saved us by spraying a bottle of water all over him!
Miss Lulu: You mean dumping?
Curly: They both mean the same thing, don't they?
( Man comes back to chasing them)
Larry: Quick! Get some more water!
Moe: That won't work again! Say, where's Curly?
( both look for him, and they find Curly eating a pie)
Moe: Gimme that pie!
( it falls onto the ceiling)
Miss Smythe-Smythe: Dear young man, do tell me about yourself!
Moe: Well, you see, ah...
Smythe-Smythe: Why, you act as though the Sword of Damocles is hanging over your head!
Moe: Lady, you must be physic!
( pie falls in Smythe-Smythe's face)
( Moe, Larry and Curly find the man and Moe has a pie in his hand)
Man: ( ducks, and closes his face up)
Moe: I'm walking out!
( Man opens up his head, and Moe throws a pie in it)
Man: ( taps on Curly's shoulder with pie-in-hand. Curly ducks, and it hits Larry)
Curly: Ha! You forgot to duck!
Larry: So, did you!
( Larry throws a pie at Curly)
( Man throws a pie at Moe, and Moe does the same to the Man)
Lady: Stop, you disgraceful vagabonds!
( Moe and Curly throw a pie in the lady's face)
Lady: Oh, so you want to play rough, do you!
( Moe and Curly ducked a pie, and it hit Man 2)
Man 2: Oh! You're going to get into trouble for doing that!
( Moe ducked a pie, and it hit Larry)
Larry: Who threw that pie? ( throws a pie at the man)
Man: It wasn't me, it was Moe!
( Larry throws a pie at Moe)
Moe: It wasn't me, it was Curly!
( Larry throws a pie at Curly)
Curly: It wasn't me, it was Ted!
Moe: There's no Ted here!
( Moe throws a pie at Larry, Larry at Curly, Curly at the Man, and the Man at the Lady, and the Lady at Man 2)
Sappington: ( comes in with a drink for someone) Your drink, madam! ( gets plastered with a pie) Pardon me, madam.
( Somebody throws a pie at Curly, but misses)
Curly: Ah! You missed me! Ah!
( Moe throws a pie at Curly)
Moe: I didn't!
( Sedletz slaps Quackenbush)
Quackenbush: Alright, I agree. The party is ruined.
Sedletz: I won the bet! HA HA HA HA! ( gets creamed with a pie)
Moe: Who started this?
Larry: You did!
( All the guests tackle Moe)

  THE END!!!

Please tell me your thoughts on this remake of Half-Wits Holiday I made! Bye!
« Last Edit: March 16, 2015, 06:19:07 PM by Shemp_is_Awesome78 »
Abbottt: Stop smoking in here, Costello!
Costello: What makes you think I'm smoking?
Abbott: You have a cigar in your mouth!
Costello: I got my shoes on, but I'm not walking!