Philly has the most loyal sports fans in the world to have to put up with the teams we have. Just a few tweaks would work.
1. Get new ownership everywhere:
A. Flyers -- Ed Snider is senile, stuck in the 1970s, and he won't fire pathetic GM Paul Holmgren.
B. Sixers -- Their owner also owns the NHL's New Jersey Devils -- 'nuff said.
C. Eagles -- Jeffrey Lurie is a diehard Patriots' fan, but he won't try to make the Eagles that good, not as long as the suckers keep buying season tickets.
D. Phillies -- The nameless, faceless, country club owners are satisfied with spokesman .300 Monty and the worst GM in all of sports, Ruin Tomorrow (and Today) Jr.
2. Give the general managers their transfers to the Russian Front, even though this is not "Hogan's Heroes."
3. See what successful teams do (Devils, Red Wings, STL Cardinals, Red Sox, Patriots, Spurs, etc.) and try those tactics.