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I Came Out of the Closet on Valentine's Day

Dunrobin · 60 · 14533

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Offline QuinceHead

Personally, I find the funniest "unintentionally(?) gay" moment during the Stooges' shorts to be in one of the Civil War shorts, when the boys are pretending to be Southern officers, and Moe utters the unforgettable line, "You done ejaculated a mouthful!"

How they slipped that one past the censors, I'll never know...  ;)

For duty and humanity,
JohnH aka QuinceHead


Offline metaldams

Personally, I find the funniest "unintentionally(?) gay" moment during the Stooges' shorts to be in one of the Civil War shorts, when the boys are pretending to be Southern officers, and Moe utters the unforgettable line, "You done ejaculated a mouthful!"

How they slipped that one past the censors, I'll never know...  ;)

For duty and humanity,
JohnH aka QuinceHead

No matter how much I watch UNCIVIL WARBIRDS, I never fail to be shocked hearing that line uttered by Moe Howard in a 1946 American film.
- Doug Sarnecky


Offline metaldams

I pretty much agree with you two about the gay stereotype unfairly being applied to Besser.  I always viewed him as an overgrown man child, but not gay.  Some posters over the years have been extremely hostile toward Besser because of this, which I find disturbing.  There are plenty of legit reasons not to like Besser as a Stooge without resorting to gay bashing.  On the other hand, there are no legit reasons to dislike Stinky.  If anybody says a bad word about Stinky, I'll haaaaaaarm you!

When I think of old Hollywood and stereotypical 1930's and 40's gay acting, I think Franklin Pangborn. See INTERNATIONAL HOUSE and the Our Gang short WILD POSES as a good example. 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Franklin_Pangborn
- Doug Sarnecky


Offline QuinceHead

No matter how much I watch UNCIVIL WARBIRDS, I never fail to be shocked hearing that line uttered by Moe Howard in a 1946 American film.

Same here!!!  :o

For duty and humanity,
JohnH aka QuinceHead


Offline QuinceHead

When I think of old Hollywood and stereotypical 1930's and 40's gay acting, I think Franklin Pangborn. See INTERNATIONAL HOUSE and the Our Gang short WILD POSES as a good example. 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Franklin_Pangborn

It's a subject that (probably for obvious reasons) has always intrigued me, particularly the way that people used to slip things past the heavy censorship of the time -- in comedies, the "sissy" / "prissy" / "high-strung" male character was usually shorthand / code for a gay character without directly identifying him as such.

There's also Edward Everett Horton; Warner Bros' Goofy Gophers, Mac and Tosh, were based on him and Pangborn.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edward_Everett_Horton

At first, I thought Pangborn was the guy who always said "Eeeeeeee-YyyyyyeeeeesssssssSSSSS?" but it turns out that was Frank Nelson.

For duty and humanity,
JohnH aka QuinceHead


Offline QuinceHead

I pretty much agree with you two about the gay stereotype unfairly being applied to Besser.  I always viewed him as an overgrown man child, but not gay.  Some posters over the years have been extremely hostile toward Besser because of this, which I find disturbing.  There are plenty of legit reasons not to like Besser as a Stooge without resorting to gay bashing.  On the other hand, there are no legit reasons to dislike Stinky.  If anybody says a bad word about Stinky, I'll haaaaaaarm you!

LOL!!!  ;D

Oddly enough, I've liked Besser in just about everything else except for the Three Stooges!  Growing up as a child of the '70s, I heard him a lot as Babu the bumbling genie on the cartoon Jeannie, and I must have seen him on old reruns of Abbott and Costello -- plus, there was that elephant in a Bugs Bunny cartoon who threatened to give Elmer Fudd "suuuuuuuuuch a pinnnnnchhhh!!!"  ;)



For duty and humanity,
JohnH aka QuinceHead


Offline metaldams

It's a subject that (probably for obvious reasons) has always intrigued me, particularly the way that people used to slip things past the heavy censorship of the time -- in comedies, the "sissy" / "prissy" / "high-strung" male character was usually shorthand / code for a gay character without directly identifying him as such.

There's also Edward Everett Horton; Warner Bros' Goofy Gophers, Mac and Tosh, were based on him and Pangborn.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Edward_Everett_Horton

At first, I thought Pangborn was the guy who always said "Eeeeeeee-YyyyyyeeeeesssssssSSSSS?" but it turns out that was Frank Nelson.

For duty and humanity,
JohnH aka QuinceHead

Oh yes, those two WB gophers.  I never knew they were modeled after Edward Everett Horton and Franklin Pangborn.  Interesting. 
- Doug Sarnecky


Offline Dunrobin

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Oh yes, those two WB gophers.  I never knew they were modeled after Edward Everett Horton and Franklin Pangborn.  Interesting.

Speaking of cartoon characters... considering how much I loved Bugs Bunny as a kid, it's amazing that I didn't become a cross-dresser.   :P


Offline QuinceHead

Oh yes, those two WB gophers.  I never knew they were modeled after Edward Everett Horton and Franklin Pangborn.  Interesting.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goofy_Gophers

For duty and humanity,
JohnH aka QuinceHead


Offline shemps#1

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I never thought of Besser's character as gay, just annoying and unfunny. In fact, despite their "lecherous" leanings (the characters not the actual men) I never really thought of the Stooges as sexual beings, so to speak. I mean three men who behaved the way they did and were almost never apart from each other wouldn't be known for pulling in strange unless they frequented orgies. This is about as much as thought I've given the Stooges' sex lives.

Have you gotten any shit from anybody yet, Rob? If not you should consider yourself (or in your case "blessed" may be apropos.)
"Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day; teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime; give a man religion and he will die praying for a fish." - Unknown


Offline Dunrobin

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Have you gotten any shit from anybody yet, Rob? If not you should consider yourself (or in your case "blessed" may be apropos.)

No one has given me any grief at all over coming out.  I was a bit worried about my father's reaction.  I've always thought of him as a hardass and I was genuinely afraid of his wrath when I was younger, and while I haven't been intimidated by him for decades I was still expecting him to be disapproving and critical.  I was shocked and thrilled when his response to my coming out was simply, "I've realized it for years but decided to not make an issue of it.  I'll always love you and am proud of who you've become."

It wouldn't do anyone any good these days trying to give me shit over being gay.  I'm not ashamed of it any more, and one advantage of getting older (at least for me) is that I don't tend to worry about other people's opinions. The hard part about coming out for me wasn't so much what others might think, but what I, myself, thought about me.


Offline Dunrobin

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Last night a relatively new member - who will remain nameless for now, in the hope that he will wise up and think before posting again - made the following reply.  It was reported as being offensive (it is) and removed from the thread, but I think the homophobic remark needs to be addressed.  (As a side note, for simplicity I used the term "gay" to refer to everyone in the LGBTQ* categories.)

Quote
It does not matter if a person is straight or gay, what is getting tedious is all these coming out crap.  it is stupid and not needed, keep if you are straight, or gay, or bi, or asexual to ones self....   these cries for publicity are sickening...

and NO this is not an anti-gay rant,  It is a rant for all these drama filled coming out announcements,  people, no matter their orientation, just live your life and stop shoving what you are in others faces

I cannot begin to tell you how idiotically wrong you are.  Attitudes like yours are what helped drive me into the closet for three long decades, and - far worse - helps drive a lot of young gays to commit suicide.

Heterosexuals have no need to "come out" - they are out.  90% of the population is straight, so of course they don't need to make any "drama filled coming out announcements."  A straight teen doesn't have to go through the "drama" of coming to terms with their sexuality that gays do, since a straight teen isn't going to get grief from anyone for being hetero.  They aren't going to have a bunch of jocks gang up and beat the living crap out of them because they are interested in the opposite sex.

Gays have all the same pressures growing up that straights have, plus a host of others.  Gays get bullied, beaten, killed and rejected by their families every damned day.  I was lucky in that no one picked on me during high school, but that is because I was (a) a big kid, and (b) I was damned good at hiding who I was.  I did know that other kids got picked on by assholes who'd accuse them of being a homo, and I had no desire to face that myself.  What "straight" ever has to deal with that?

Gay youths are four times more likely to kill themselves than straight kids.  How many kids have been driven to commit suicide because they cannot handle the abuse and rejection that comes when it is revealed that they are "normal"?  Not a damned one. 

You betray your own homophobia when you say stupid things like "NO this is not an anti-gay rant" followed by "stop shoving what you are in others faces."  I'll stop shoving my sexuality in your face when you can figure out how to stop stuffing your sexuality in my face.

By the way, you do realize, don't you, that you could have just done the mature thing and skipped this thread altogether if the subject bothers you?  If I took the time to respond to everything on the Internet that bothers me I'd never have time to get anything else done.

I'm not going to ban the author from this site - yet - but I will if there is any more gay-bashing in any form.


* LBGTQ stands for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Questioning.  I had to look it up myself when I came out, as I couldn't figure out what the heck the Q stood for.


Offline QuinceHead

To be honest, I was slightly surprised (in a pleasant way) that it took this long for a negative comment to pop up in this thread...  ::)

For duty and humanity,
JohnH aka QuinceHead


Offline Dunrobin

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To be honest, I was slightly surprised (in a pleasant way) that it took this long for a negative comment to pop up in this thread...  ::)

For duty and humanity,
JohnH aka QuinceHead

I am a bit surprised, too.  I was originally tempted to leave the post deleted and just ban the person responsible when I saw the emails this morning, but then I decided that this needed to be addressed.

While chatting online with several other gay men who are roughly my own age, I've been amazed to realize how many of us went through similar things, and how many stayed in the closet and tried desperately for years to be "normal."  I don't want to see anyone else feel that they need to do the same thing, and that means that we all - gay or straight - need to confront homophobia head on.  I'm not putting up with it anymore.


Offline Larrys#1

I was lucky in that no one picked on me during high school, but that is because I was (a) a big kid, and (b) I was damned good at hiding who I was.  I did know that other kids got picked on by assholes who'd accuse them of being a homo, and I had no desire to face that myself.  What "straight" ever has to deal with that?

Ironically, I was a straight kid and was about 6 feet in high school and was still bullied. Lucky you for not getting bullied. It's no fun.


Offline QuinceHead

I am a bit surprised, too.  I was originally tempted to leave the post deleted and just ban the person responsible when I saw the emails this morning, but then I decided that this needed to be addressed.

While chatting online with several other gay men who are roughly my own age, I've been amazed to realize how many of us went through similar things, and how many stayed in the closet and tried desperately for years to be "normal."  I don't want to see anyone else feel that they need to do the same thing, and that means that we all - gay or straight - need to confront homophobia head on.  I'm not putting up with it anymore.

I realize I might be "lapsing into stereotype" myself by what I'm about to post, but a part of me always assumed (and I'm not even 100% sure why) that most Stooges fans tend to be older, heterosexual and of a conservative bent, and thus not necessarily prone to be approving of homosexuality and/or gay Stooge fans revealing this facet of themselves in a forum dedicated to our favorite knuckleheads.

Then again, some posters on here might not be fussed about the subject, while others could privately disapprove but don't feel the need to air their opinions in a public forum.

For duty and humanity,
JohnH aka QuinceHead

P.S.:  For what it's worth, the only other gay man I know who's also open about being Three Stooges fan is the author/historian William J. Mann.


Offline QuinceHead

Ironically, I was a straight kid and was about 6 feet in high school and was still bullied. Lucky you for not getting bullied. It's no fun.

I do think that Larrys#1 makes a good point -- bullying does exist for kids of all orientations, particularly those who don't conform to the social norm (or for whatever passes for a reason in the minds of the bully or bullies).

I know that I had more than my fair share of being picked on by my "peers" when I was a kid, but most of what I experienced was verbal/psychological rather than physical.  Doesn't mean it didn't hurt in its own way, though...  :(

For duty and humanity,
JohnH aka QuinceHead


Offline Dunrobin

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Ironically, I was a straight kid and was about 6 feet in high school and was still bullied. Lucky you for not getting bullied. It's no fun.

True - there are bullies who will pick on anyone they think they can intimidate, regardless of the reason.  And I suppose there are also plenty of straight kids who get called "queer" even though it isn't true.

I had some trouble with a bully when I was younger, in seventh grade - until I finally challenged him to a one-on-one fight behind the school and managed to beat him.  No one ever bothered me in that school after that (bullies are usually cowards at heart, which is why they go after those they perceive as weaker.)  Of course, no one knew anything about that at my second high school, so I guess I just had an arrogant swagger or something, since no one ever bothered me there.

I hit 6' when I was 17 and joined the Army, and I didn't stop growing until I was 20, when I topped off at 6'3" (which was a damned nuisance, because every year when we'd have to fall in for the annual inspection in our dress uniforms mine were always too short and I've have to go get new ones issued again.)


Offline Dunrobin

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Bromance
This just seems appropriate for this thread.   ;)

[youtube=560,315]EJVt8kUAm9Q[/youtube]


Offline metaldams

I went to high school in the 90's when grunge and alternative, along with Marilyn Manson and Nine Inch Nails were popular (it was a shitty time to be a metal fan), and I have to say, while there were certainly some homophobic kids, as a whole it was almost cool to be bisexual.  Kids still do get picked on today from what I hear, but I think the current generation has eased up some. 

I do remember this one girl who was openly a lesbian in my high school who wrote a poem which appeared in the school paper.  It was about kissing a bearded lip, and when word got around about her and its true meaning, there was controversy. Bear in mind I attended a Catholic high school.

My father, on the other hand, is a few years older than Rob and is one of the biggest homophobes you'll ever meet.  Since he's representative of a lot of his generation in some ways, it must've been very tough for his gay peers.  He literally cannot tell the difference between beastiality and homosexuality and also can't understand how his two heterosexual sons get so pissed at him for his attitude.  It all boils down to he non-aggression principal with me, something he sadly does not understand.
- Doug Sarnecky


Offline Senorita Rita

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Hey Dunrobin, I know I'm late to the thread, but I want to add my well wishes and congratulations on coming to peace with who you really are. I think it's awesome when people, especially more, shall we say, mature adults, are able to re-start their lives once they find that missing piece (or peace) of the puzzle. I'm not gay, but I support LGBT pride and rights, and stories like these give me hope that as a woman now in her *coughthirtiescough*, it's not too late to discover something new and liberating that might set me on a different life path.

Best of luck!
...to say the least, if not less...


Offline Dunrobin

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Thank you, Rita - I appreciate that, and it's good to see you on the site again!   ;D


curly b

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I know that it's not really relevant to this site, but I just wanted you guys to know that I "officially" came out of the closet on Thursday.  I'm Gay, and I'm no longer ashamed to say so.

The fact that it was Valentine's Day was actually just a coincidence.  My "little" brother, who has been my best friend all of my life, has been living on the other side of the state for over a year, and we only get to see him every couple of weeks when he comes for an overnight visit.  I told him, and the rest of the family, Thursday when he got here.

If you're interested in the sordid details, I've also started a new blog and posted my coming out story there.  I'll be posting there occasionally, and probably much more often once I get all the bugs fixed here on ThreeStooges.net.  (Brent's probably gonna skin me alive if I don't.)



Actually, I guess this news is somewhat relevant to the site.  You may have noticed that last June I made the comment, "Last, but not least, I simply got burnt out and frustrated, by these problems and by a number of other personal issues."  Well, this was the primary "other personal issue" I was dealing with.  I went into a severe funk over the past couple of years dealing with this issue, and it just got worse as time went on.  It finally hit the breaking point right after New Year's, and fortunately when I searched online for answers I found them.  It's caused me to completely re-evaluate my beliefs and finally led to me accepting myself for who I am, and realizing that God doesn't hate me for it.

Fortunately the funk is over.  I now feel free to be myself and embrace life again, and in turn I am feeling much more focused again.  And now it's time to get back to work, before I really do drive poor Brent crazy.


Gay and happy, How is that possible?  LOL    God doesn't hate anyone, he hate's the SIN, and we all sin.  In God's mind, murder is the same as lying or stealing. PERIOD...   It is a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and our proclaiming him as our Lord and Savior.  We should repent of all sin as quickly as we realize we did it and strive to rid ourselves of it as we grow in Christ, and continue to praise and worship God.         Don't hate me because i'm blessed and a Christian. LOL


Offline metaldams


Gay and happy, How is that possible?  LOL    God doesn't hate anyone, he hate's the SIN, and we all sin.  In God's mind, murder is the same as lying or stealing. PERIOD...   It is a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and our proclaiming him as our Lord and Savior.  We should repent of all sin as quickly as we realize we did it and strive to rid ourselves of it as we grow in Christ, and continue to praise and worship God.         Don't hate me because i'm blessed and a Christian. LOL


So Slipp, I still see you have that Pharisee thing down pat.  I'll let Rob handle this one.
- Doug Sarnecky


Offline Dunrobin

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Gay and happy, How is that possible?  LOL    God doesn't hate anyone, he hate's the SIN, and we all sin.  In God's mind, murder is the same as lying or stealing. PERIOD...   It is a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and our proclaiming him as our Lord and Savior.  We should repent of all sin as quickly as we realize we did it and strive to rid ourselves of it as we grow in Christ, and continue to praise and worship God.         Don't hate me because i'm blessed and a Christian. LOL

Yes, gay and happy - of course it's possible, in spite of bigoted jackasses who try to make life miserable for others.

I agree with your statements about sin, in that the Bible makes it clear that (1) everybody has sinned, and (2) God views all sins as being equally wrong, and I thank God every day that He has saved us from our sins.  Where we may disagree is that I do not believe that homosexuality is a sin.  I don't believe that God ever says that it is, and that the (literally) handful of verses (out of over 31,000!) in the Bible used by hateful people to condemn gays are being taken out of context, thus they are guilty of perverting the Word of God.  (See the two attachments for more information.)

So no, I don't "hate (you) because (you're) blessed and a Christian;" I am, too.  I won't hate you even if you are a bigoted, Pharisaical jackass posing as a Christian, like those "Westboro Baptist Church" twits, but I won't allow anyone to push homophobia on my site, so be forewarned.

-------------------------
Note:  I should clarify that the "Blue Book" attachment, below, is a document issued by The Presbyterian Church, Mt. Kisco, New York, discussing their views on homosexuality and the Bible in the form of "Frequently Asked Questions."  (Added April 6, 2013.)