Now for some "sorta kinda" realistic names.
7.) EMIL - Does anyone know what name Emil would have adopted if he had become our next beloved "third" stooge? Moe, of course, promised to cast him as the third stooge in future episodes of our boys, but Moe died before anything could come of it. I dunno if Moe would have liked calling him "Emil", much like Babe/Jerry/Jerome got called "Curly" for the camera. Would he have been called "Larry"? The vanishingly small poster shots of him, Moe, and Curly-Joe do show him with "weird" hair.
8.) MOE - Let's assume that Moe dies next. (Since Curly-Joe lives until 1993, Emil lives until 1998, and Moe died in 1975)
We have whatever name Emil has adopted, and the roly-poly Curly-Joe, now we need to graft a dominant "MOE" character into the mix. Regardless of who or how the actor mirrors/mimics Moe's characteristics on camera, I think he MUST adopt the name MOE. The only reason to give him another name would be to allow Emil Sitka or Joe Derita to become the next "Moe" character. Insert an actor with the will to imitate Moe, and voila!
(9 & 10.) Who cares!! After Moe is dead, the Three Stooges legacy evaporated. (IMHO)
Although, the requirement was for Three Commandments and Ten Stooges, so ...
As far as the three commandments, please refer to George Carlin's exposition on the ten commandments. (He cut it down to only two, so add and innocuous one for comfort)
9.) Chrissy - The implanted Moe character goes, and I wanna say Joe - Joe Besser returns! (just like Shemp!) but that would not be the "ninth" Stooge, only Joe number 5 coming back. We need a female Stooge member by now, its the '80's!
10.) Dopey - Okay, now Chrissy gets a huge movie contract (to mimic her huge breasts) and leaves our boys. (Remember - Emil and Curly-Joe?) So, after losing the boobs, go for the boob.
